» 8 Signs your Relationship is in Jeopardy

These 8 signs may tell you that it's time to call it quits on your relationship.
And when things aren’t going well, you can feel that, too. Here are eight signs that your relationship may be in jeopardy.

He or she Cringes During the “Where are we headed?” Talk

It’s a fair request to ask for some clarity about where the relationship is going. You don’t want to put too much pressure on the other person, but there is nothing wrong with trying to get a sense of where things stand. If your partner freaks out and gets defensive whenever you bring up the subject, then he or she may not be as invested in the relationship as you are. That’s not necessarily a problem, especially early in your time together. But if you two have been together for a good long while and your partner still doesn’t want to even discuss the status of your relationship, then that’s a definite sign that your relationship is in jeopardy.
One of you Constantly Demands to be the Center of the Relationship

Ideally, a relationship is made up of two individuals who work to achieve a balance. On the one hand, they each want to make sure that their individual needs are being met. On the other hand, they are willing to make sacrifices for their partner and compromise, even when it goes against their own desires. If your partner is demanding too much attention, ordering you around, and insisting on having his or her way every time a disagreement arises, then that’s a problem. You two are probably going to have a hard time building the kind of respectful relationship that allows for maximum personal and relational growth if one of you refuses to compromise and sacrifice.
The Focus is Always on what’s Wrong, Rather than what’s Right

When you two talk about how things are going between you, do you seem to always end up trying to address problems? If so, your relationship might be in trouble. This isn’t to say that you shouldn’t address relational obstacles. Even the healthiest relationships face conflict and struggle from time to time. And, of course, you two should try to resolve whatever difficulties you face together. But if it seems that all you ever do when you talk about your relationship is solve problems and overcome difficulties, as opposed to enjoying each other’s company and laughing together, then something may not be quite right between you.
Conflict is a Permanent part of your Relationship

Again, there’s nothing wrong with arguing. All couples do. And conflict, when it’s handled in a way that is respectful, can actually be good for a relationship. But if you feel that all you and your partner do is argue, that’s a problem. A healthy relationship is full of laughter, gratitude, kindness, and respect. If conflict is crowding out all these elements and leaving you with nothing but constant squabbling, then it’s going to be tough to build a meaningful and fulfilling relationship.
One of you is Frequently Jealous

There has to be a high level of trust for any relationship to work. Both people need to know that when they aren’t together, they don’t have to worry about what the other person is up to. If you find yourself always wondering if your partner is being true, then that will be a huge hurdle for your relationship to overcome. Likewise, if your partner refuses to trust you even though you have given him or her no reason to doubt you, that’s another sign that the relationship isn’t headed in a promising direction.
One of you is Feeling less Invested in Spending Time Together

There are going to be times when one of you legitimately has to spend extra time at work or on some other type of project. And there will be times when you’ll spend time with other friends and your family. But if an ongoing pattern emerges where your significant other is repeatedly choosing to spend more time with his or her friends than with you, or to put in more time than necessary at work, it could be a warning sign. When all kinds of distractions continually pull your partner away, there’s a good chance that those distractions have become more important in your partner’s mind than you are.
One of you isn’t Feeling Supported

Constant (or even frequent) criticism is one of the most obvious signs that a relationship is in trouble. It can really wear you down to hear over and over again that you should dress differently, avoid making a certain type of joke, or act a certain way when you’re with a certain group of friends. And it’s just as hard on a relationship. Constant criticism is often a sign of underlying anger or insecurity—neither of which makes a relationship work well. If you continually harp on the negative characteristics of each other, leaving out all the positive qualities you each possess, then it’s going to be hard for the relationship to succeed.
Your Emotional Needs aren’t Being Met

We all have certain desires and expectations for how we expect to be treated by the people we care about. And some of those desires and expectations are actual needs. In other words, we can’t survive and thrive as individuals if those needs aren’t met. So if one or both of you is failing to have your most basic emotional needs addressed by the connection you share, then that’s a definite sign that your relationship may be in jeopardy.

If two or three of the items in this list apply to you and your partner, there may not be anything to really worry about it. You should still explore that facet of your relationship and see if you can strengthen the bond you share. But as noted before, even the best relationships struggle from time to time.

If you read through the 8 signs in this article and found yourself relating to these issues much more than you’d like, then this is a good time to give some serious thought to the question of whether this a relationship into which you want to invest so much of your time, mind, and heart.

» 5 Ways Success Destroys Relationships

Is your red hot career putting a damper on your dating life? Power, priorities and time constraints can play a big role in this relationship challenge.



You’ve finally done it. After years of hard work, you’ve reached the pinnacle of success in your company, and you’ve finally got the big salary and all the perks that go along with it. Sure, you have more responsibility and more pressure, but that goes with the territory. You are riding high. So why is your relationship foundering?
Click here to find out more!
1. There’s an imbalance of power.

When one partner is more successful than the other, it’s bound to put a strain on the relationship. The successful partner has more money, more recognition, more influence, and more satisfaction. The financial burden may be falling mostly on the successful partner, so the other partner doesn’t feel like he or she is contributing much in that regard. Even though he’s making an effort to treat you as an equal, you often feel out of the loop and like an insignificant other. He talks about his work, his colleagues, and “the business,” while you feel at a loss to compete. Your lack of self-respect for what you contribute can be lethal to your relationship.
2. Ego gets in the way.

She’s a big shot at work, and she knows it. Deals revolve around her expertise, and everyone looks to her for direction. She calls the shots, and her coworkers line up behind her. Unfortunately, while relationships are about compromise, she’s used to getting her way, without question. Sometimes you feel more like her personal assistant than an equal partner, and it’s starting to take its toll. If she doesn’t get off her high horse, there’s little hope that your relationship will make it in the long term.
3. You don’t have any time.

You work long hours and feel that putting in a weekend now and then is necessary. When you’re not at work, you’re always available by cell phone, and it seems that time with your partner is constantly interrupted by matters that you feel can’t wait. You know that people at the office rely on your input, and you feel pressure to be there when needed. You are an indispensible piece of the puzzle at work, but your relationship is slipping farther and farther down your list of priorities. No wonder your partner’s getting fed up.
4. Your priorities shift.

You used to look forward to weekends, when you and your partner would hang out with friends, enjoying a casual night out or watching a football game together. Along with your new success, however, has come a list of new priorities. Playing golf with potential clients, going for after-work drinks with colleagues, and hobnobbing with industry insiders suddenly seem much more important than those old friends and recreational pursuits. Your focus is on your continued advancement, and maintaining a stable relationship seems to require too much effort and time that you don’t have. Your bond with your significant other is in big trouble.
5. Your options change.

No one paid too much attention to you while you were climbing the ladder of success, but now that you’re a CEO, members of the opposite sex find you irresistibly interesting and attractive. You find that you have more in common with colleagues than with your partner, who seems less desirable than younger or more business-savvy connections who openly admire your expertise and continuing success. You are in la-la land and are completely taken with your new options, so you aren’t sure that your relationship is worth saving. In your opinion, it’s time for your partner to shape up or ship out.

» Dating Tips for the Second Time Around

Dating doesn't have to be daunting as long as you know how the game has changed. It's not that different than you remember, either. The key is putting yourself out there.



If you’ve been out of the dating scene for awhile, being thrust back into it after a divorce or following the death of a spouse can be daunting indeed. No, you don’t have to hang out in bars or clubs to find a date (although that’s one possible way to meet someone). There are plenty of other ways to meet people, so step out and try something new!

1. Get Online

These days, you don’t have to go very far from home to put yourself out there. Now, more than ever, people are turning to the Internet as a place to meet. There are message boards and chat rooms galore, and you can join listservs and groups that focus on your interests. Whatever reservations people used to have about online dating are mostly a thing of the past, so check out the buzz on the best online dating sites, and then log on and create a profile.

Click here to find out more!
As thousands of people can testify, it really is possible to meet your soul mate online. Making that connection may be the first step in forming a new relationship.

2. Change your Routine

It’s easy to get into a rut when you’re living alone, especially if you don’t feel like socializing. But seeing your single status as a chance for discovery will not only expand your life, it also will help you meet people. Join a club that sponsors monthly programs and group excursions, such as the local Audubon Society. Take an art class; even if it turns out that you aren’t much of an artist, you’ll meet new people and learn new skills. Start going to church, and participate in the after-service coffee hour. Or sign up for a tour to someplace you’ve always wanted to go. Think of your new adventures not as a quest to find Mr. or Ms. Right, but as an opportunity to enrich your life. Getting dates is just the frosting on the cake.

3. Prepare for Ups and Downs

Once you are back in the dating groove, there’s no guarantee that you’ll have one positive experience after another. Enduring a string of bad dates with potential partners who don’t make the grade can be discouraging, and there will be times when you’re just plain tired of making the effort. Don’t be afraid to take a break and use the time to nourish yourself and recoup whatever self-esteem you may have lost in the process. You can’t put your best foot forward unless you are feeling good about yourself, so do whatever it takes to stay optimistic and upbeat.

4. Have Fun!

Although you may view your reentry into the dating scene with trepidation at first, it’s important that you learn to have fun with these new experiences. Initially, don’t be focused on the goal of finding a steady partner or a spouse. Instead, look forward to each new encounter as a chance to meet someone new and to expand your circle of friends and acquaintances. If you proceed with an open mind, you just might be surprised at what is out there waiting for you!

» I'm Right, She's Left. Are we Doomed?

You have fun together, there's great chemistry, but you don't vote the same way. Actually, you can't agree on politics at all. Are you doomed?

Arnold and Maria make it work. Can we?

There are a few subjects that make people more emotional than politics, but not many. For whatever reason, discussing whom we will vote for can get most of us pretty riled up.

So what do you do if the person you’re dating—a person who is usually reasonable, insightful, logical, and full of sanity—for some reason can’t see the light when it comes to the upcoming election? How in the world do you two make it during these last few weeks and still maintain some semblance of a loving and respectful relationship?

Well, it’s a tough situation you’re in, but plenty of couples have weathered this type of storm in the past. In fact, a lot of very compatible people with opposite political views can have successful marriages. What’s important is to agree on a strategy for how to address the reality that one of you is a donkey and the other, an elephant. Here are a few different approaches you might consider.

Declare the Subject Off Limits

This may not seem like the most mature approach, but it’s at least somewhat safe. In other words, it might be more ideal if you two could discuss all the issues in a loving and respectful way, and then simply agree to disagree on the points where you diverge. But that’s not always possible. Some people just have such strong feelings when it comes to certain political issues that they can’t calmly and reasonably discuss their opinions and feelings with someone who disagrees with them. (Especially if that person usually seems so smart and reasonable but on this issue has willfully chosen to be blind!)

So what do you do if yours is one of those relationships where the two of you have a hard time discussing politics without infuriating each other? This option is to put a moratorium on all political conversations. No discussions whatsoever. You don’t even watch coverage of speeches and debates together, lest one of you lets out too heavy of a sigh or guffaws at what the other partner considers to be an out and out lie by the other partner’s candidate. One of you can watch FOX News, the other Keith Olberman. But you don’t do it together. And you focus all your conversations on other worthy topics, like sports, religion, your relationship, what’s happening on Lost, and so on. But not politics. Sure, you’ll miss out on knowing each other as well as you might otherwise, but at least you won’t kill each other.

Listen and Learn

This approach to political differences in your relationship may be the most difficult one to pull off. It asks you to genuinely listen to each other and to more fully understand where the other person is coming from. The goal in this case is not necessarily agreement or swaying the other’s opinion. In other words, you aren’t trying to win an argument or to convert your significant other to your positions and perspectives. Instead, you two are trying to come to a place of mutual respect and understanding. And that’s not easy to do, especially when it comes to an emotionally hot topic like politics.

There are a few main steps you two have to take in order to make this approach work. First, you must find a way to express your points from a place of respect and sensitivity. Name-calling, clichéd labels, and an unfair use of sound bites should be strictly forbidden. Also, you both have to be willing to listen to each other. And we mean really listen, with good motives and in good faith, so that you each feel that you are being given the opportunity to express your thoughts and feelings. Then, once you have both said how you feel and have listened hard to each other, you should each repeat back the other’s main points, demonstrating that you really do understand where the other person is coming from.

This kind of conversation, where you both remain on a respectful and adult level, can strengthen and deepen the connection you feel for each other. You might even find that the other person has well-thought-out reasons for his or her position that you respect, even if you don’t agree. And even if you simply agree to disagree, you will have achieved a much fuller understanding of each other, as well as a stronger bond in your relationship.

There’s no reason you can’t bring your strong emotions into this approach. Kindness and respect are required, but you shouldn’t feel that you have to check your feelings at the door. Talk about how you feel and express your strongest opinions. Just do it in a way that keeps in mind that you are talking to a person you care for and whom you want to treat in a way that he or she deserves to be treated—no matter how wrong or blind you think that person may be.